Category Archives: bullshit

From the Annals of the Ironically Named

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I was at the library last night and I happened to notice, in one of the return carts, a book by Arlen Specter called Passion for Truth.  A book by a politician about how much of a hard on he has for the truth—and a big, thick one at that (the book, not the hard on).  I found this amusing, for obvious reasons, and it got me to thinking that maybe they should do a series along the lines of the for Dummies books.  Here are a few possible titles:

Passion for Freedom, by David Patraeus

Passion for Justice, by Eric Holder

Passion for Losing, by Charlie Sheen

Passion for Education, by Arne Duncan

Passion for Altruism, by Hank Paulson

Passion for Knowledge, Erudition, and a Non-moronic-sounding Nickname, by The Situation

Passion for Women Over the Age of 30, by Donald Trump

Passion for Human Life, by this guy

I think I may have a winner on my hands here.

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So it goes

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I don’t know, but I think there might be some irony tucked away somewhere in here:

Segway company owner dies after rolling into river

Associated Press/AP Online

LONDON – A British businessman who last year bought the company that makes the two-wheeled Segway personal transporter has died in an accident on one of the vehicles.

Police in West Yorkshire said Monday that 62-year-old James Heselden and a Segway were found in the River Wharfe near Boston Spa, in northern England.

Police said a member of the public had reported seeing a man fall over a 30-foot (9-meter) drop into the river on Sunday.

Heselden bought control of the New Hampshire-based Segway company in December.

He made a fortune through his firm Hesco Bastion which developed a system replacing sand bags to protect troops.

When your interaction with others begins to resemble a beer commercial…

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…it may be time to stop interacting with others.  Or at least some others.

I went over to a coworker’s cubicle yesterday to ask him a question, and as I was turning to leave I noticed, out of the corner of my eye, that he was pointing a fist at me.  It took me a second to realize that he was waiting for a fist bump.  A fucking fist bump!  I hesitated, seriously considering leaving him hanging, but I decided to play nice.  I went over and tapped his fist with mine and then walked away, waiting for the music to begin and someone to walk over and hand me a Budweiser.